Kirsty Parson’s PND Story

Postnatal depression, depression and exercise

So this is a big deal for me to write this out as its something i have never done, I suffered terribly with post natal depression after my first son Alfie (i have since gone on to have 2 more beautiful babies, i was 19 when i had him and after a difficult birth i then struggled to breast feed him to which completely knocked me and i soon noticed myself feeling so low I wouldn't want to get out of bed, wasnt sleeping, I was having panic attacks and feeling like there was a thick dark cloud hanging over me, to which ben(my wonderful husband) stepped in and was the amazing father he still is to this day.

He did everything. I felt like I had no bond with Alfie and that I didn't deserve to be his mum. After a long time I suffered on and after my family and the ones closest me telling me to talk to someone i finally did it was raw and i talked so much and it brought up a lot of pain I had been holding in for many years... I was put on various pills and whilst I was still struggling through I noticed myself get really bad and this is when the suicidal thoughts started (I think due to frustration of not wanting to feel this way but not being able to get out of this thick dark cloud) I thought Alfie and Ben would be better off without me, these feelings made me do the worst thing imaginable I attempted suicide and ended up in hospital having my stomach pumped and having fits, i am lucky to be alive. But once i had started to feel half human again something switched and I regretted what I had done and wanted to sort myself out as this was a cry for help!!

I got involved with health in mind who were amazing and helped me deal with all these emotions, fears and get on steady medication which I started to notice and improvement, it helps so much to talk and let it all out but at this point i also was advised to start doing regular exercise to which i started firstly with exercise dvds at home and started eating better which made me feel better and more in control of my life and my body so then felt more confident to go to classes, obviously dragging friends along to start with.

I am writing this out today to try and help anyone struggling with depression or PND please firstly talk to someone and honestly give exercise a go, it is proven that regular exercise can boost your mood (you need to find an exercise you enjoy and look forward to something FUN) any exercise is better than none and even a brisk 10 minute walk is better than nothing.

I really find that when I'm stressed after a long day of work and children to go to a class and let go and enjoy myself really helps me, i genuinely think more mums and people suffering with depression should be told the benefits of exercise as its not something they are recommending !

I have written this today to try and help, this was very difficult for me to write but i don't want anyone to go through what me and my family did, if you have anything negative to say on this please keep it to yourself this is my story and its very hard for me to open up about this.

This is the number for mind- 030012343393- please if you are struggling but are uncomfortable with speaking to someone close to you it does help to speak to a stranger that wants to help.

Please don't suffer in silence, at bodyfit revolution we care and want to help in any way we can.

The NHS website has lots of information on depressions and its symptoms and also explaining that exercise helps, so please have a look.

Don't suffer in silence.

Kirsty Parsons

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